This evening, my heart is grieving.
Not about one thing, but oh so many things.
The pain at times seems so unbearable. My heart aches. It hurts. It longs for God to move. Not just to heal my heart, but to touch the very reasons I’m grieving.
Today, I grieve over the lost of Steven Curtis Chapman’s daughter. The pain, and the guilt their son must feel, it must be unbearable at this time.
I grieve for the body of Christ. People are flocking again to Florida for some sort of move. A move that is based more on occult practices, dreams, visions, and pure imagination and emotionalism and not on God’s Word. People are so blind. They are falling into the pit headlong. Oh they are zealous for God, but the enemy is using this I’m afraid to lead so many astray. I’ve been in contact with some people on some forums. You can show them Scripture, but they say, “Look at all the people worshiping Jesus. Look at all the healings, look at all the miracles.” Oh, how my heart is breaking over this deception. Our world is dying and going to hell and we play games. God has a true move of the Spirit and we seem to mock His moving by running to these false things. Lord, please open our eyes before lives are destroyed!
I grieve for the body that I pastor. There so many hurts and pains. All carried over from past churches, or other times people may have been wronged. I’ve made mistakes, and said things that some people misunderstand. Now grudges are being held in some cases, others, just hurting hearts. Oh, how I long to be perfect. To have all the answers. To be able to meet every need, answer every prayer. My heart aches over this. Is this what it means to have a Pastor’s heart? If it is, it is almost unbearable to me.
What can I do with my grieving heart? Do I dare ask the Lord to heal it? Or do I dare to believe that He wants me to grieve over the sins of our nation, the sins of the church in America, and the sins and hurts and pains of the local church that I pastor?
This grief that I feel is almost to much for me to carry.
Lord God Almighty – We need you, or we will die! Please Lord, put it in your children’s hearts to play no more games. Put it in your children’s heart to love their brother and sister more than life itself. Put it in your children’s heart to see the lost as you see them. Hopeless, headed for an eternal hell. May we shed tears for the lost! Oh Father, draw people to Christ! Oh Father, let us see a true revival. Not a revival of signs and wonders that are subjective and manipulative. But let us see a revival of the preaching of your Word that shakes the foundations of churches. That shakes the hearts of the lost and draws those you have redeemed to Christ. Let us put away our entertainment games we call church services and once again may we see our churches as houses of prayer. We need you, or we will die. Save us oh God from ourselves!
In Jesus name!